Fingernails And Indigestion At The 2025 Ig Nobel Prizes

This is Science Friday. I’m Ira Flatow. Hope you had a peaceful and happy Thanksgiving. Now with the big feast in the past, we of course begin the long march towards the winter holidays, fueled hopefully by some leftover turkey and pie.

Well, here at Science Friday, the day after Thanksgiving is our own kind of holiday observance, featuring highlights from this year’s Ig Nobel Award ceremony. Now, if you’re not familiar with the Igs, they are science awards for scientific research, real stuff, that first makes you laugh and then makes you think. The awards are handed out each year by the editors of the science humor magazine the Annals of Improbable Research.

So here’s our post-Thanksgiving tradition as we hop in the SciFri time machine to travel back to mid-September on the campus of Boston University, where the dignitaries and Ignitaries are preparing to take the stage.

[“THE ELEMENTS” PLAYING]

(SINGING) There’s an ammonia, arsenic, aluminum, selenium

And hydrogen and oxygen and nitrogen and rhenium

And nickel, neodymium, neptunium, germanium

And iron, americium, ruthenium, uranium

Europium, zirconium, lutetium, vanadium

And lanthanum and osmium and astatine and radium

And gold, protactinium, and indium and gallium

And iodine and thorium and thulium and thallium

There’s yttrium, ytterbium, actinium, rubidium

And boron, gadolinium, niobium, iridium

And strontium and silicon and silver and samarium

And bismuth, bromine, lithium, beryllium and barium

[APPLAUSE]

SPEAKER 1: That music may be familiar to many of you. Tom Lehrer wrote those meticulously, ridiculously perfect lyrics and recorded that song way back in 1959. Tom Lehrer was in the audience at the very first Ig Nobel Prize ceremony in 1991. He advised and helped with several of the early Ig ceremonies, especially with the operas. Tom died a few weeks ago at the age of 97. We miss him.

[APPLAUSE]

And now Barry Duncan will give the traditional Ig Nobel Welcome, Welcome speech.

BARY DUNCAN: Welcome. Welcome!

[APPLAUSE]

SPEAKER 2: Tonight, we’re going to award the 2025 Ig Nobel Prizes. This year’s winners represent many countries and exactly one planet. Now, ladies and gentlemen, literati, glitterati, pseudo-intellectuals. Quasi-pseudo-intellectuals, pseudo-quasi-intellectuals, large language models, very stable geniuses, hasbeens, hustlers, indigestibles, and the rest of you, may I introduce our master of ceremonies, the editor of The Annals of Improbable Research, Chief Airhead Marc Abrahams.

[APPLAUSE]

MARC ABRAHAMS: Tonight we honor some remarkable individuals and groups. Every Ig Nobel Prize winner has done something that first makes people laugh and then makes them think. The Ig Nobel Prize ceremony is produced by the magazine, The Annals of Improbable Research, and produced in collaboration with the Boston University College of Communications. The editors of The Annals of Improbable Research have chosen a theme for this year’s ceremony. That theme is digestion.

[CHEERING]

The theme may or may not apply to particular prizes. Tonight, 10 prizes will be given. The achievements speak for themselves. The prizes will be presented to the winners by Nobel laureates. Please welcome the Nobel laureates who will hand out the prizes. Let’s give each of them a hand, a 2023 Nobel laureate in chemistry, Moungi Bawendi–

[APPLAUSE]

–a 2007 Nobel laureate in economics, Eric Maskin–

[APPLAUSE]

–a 2019 Nobel laureate in economics, Esther Duflo–

[APPLAUSE]

–a 1997 Nobel laureate in economics, Robert Merton–

[APPLAUSE]

–a 2022 Nobel laureate in physiology or medicine, Svante Paabo–

[APPLAUSE]

–a 2019 Nobel laureate in physiology or medicine, William Kaelin–

[APPLAUSE]

–a 1990 Nobel laureate in physics, Jerome Friedman.

[APPLAUSE]

He’s again unable to be here tonight, but here he is via the magic of recorded video.

[VIDEO PLAYBACK]

– Congratulations. I hope you are enjoying this as much as I am.

[LAUGHTER]

[END PLAYBACK]

MARC ABRAHAMS: Thank you, Professor Friedman. As you know, we used to have a problem in this ceremony. Many of the speakers would exceed their allotted time. Here’s how we have traditionally solved that problem. Please welcome the charming, delightful, ever-so-cute eight-year-old Miss Sweetie Poo–

[APPLAUSE]

–sort of. Well, unfortunately, the real Miss Sweetie Poo was not able to be here tonight. And so the role of Miss Sweetie Poo will be performed by a last minute, older, larger substitute, our majordomo, Gary Dreyfuss.

[LAUGHTER]

[APPLAUSE]

Miss Sweetie Poo, would you demonstrate what you’ll do when somebody exceeds his or her allotted time?

GARY DREYFUSS: Please stop. I’m bored. Please stop. I’m bored. Please stop. I’m bored. Please stop. I’m bored. Please stop. I’m bored.

MARC ABRAHAMS: Thank you, Ms. Sweetie Poo. Now, Miss Sweetie Poo–

GARY DREYFUSS: Please Stop. I’m bored.

MARC ABRAHAMS: Thank you, Miss–

GARY DREYFUSS: Please stop. I’m bored.

MARC ABRAHAMS: Thank you–

GARY DREYFUSS: Please stop. I’m–

MARC ABRAHAMS: Thank you. Thank you, Miss Sweetie Poo.

GARY DREYFUSS: –bored.

MARC ABRAHAMS: Thank you.

[APPLAUSE]

We’ll now get set for the 24/7 Lectures. We’ve invited several of the world’s top thinkers to tell us very briefly what they’re thinking about. Each 24/7 Lecturer will explain their subject twice, first, a complete technical description in 24 seconds, and then after a brief pause, a clear summary that anyone can understand in seven words. The 24-second time limit will be enforced by the time enforcer.

This first 24/7 Lecture will be delivered by Ben Smith, Director of the Monell Chemical Senses Center and co-winner of the 2005 Ig Nobel Biology Prize. He won that prize for painstakingly smelling and cataloging the peculiar odors produced by 131 different species of frogs when the frogs were feeling stressed. The topic– taste, smell, and digestion.

[APPLAUSE]

First, a complete technical description of the subject in 24 seconds. On your mark, get set, go.

BEN SMITH: Smell and taste play critical roles in the cephalic phase of digestion, initiating salivation and gastric secretions before food even enters the mouth. Olfactory and gustatory stimuli trigger neural pathways that prime the gastrointestinal tract. Interoception, the sensing of internal bodily states, regulates digestive feedback, modulating enzyme release, motility, and satiety signals. Together, these systems integrate sensory input with physiological–

[WHISTLE BLOWS]

–responses to optimize nutrient breakdown and absorption.

[WHISTLE BLOWS]

[LAUGHTER]

MARC ABRAHAMS: And now a–

[APPLAUSE]

–clear summary that anyone can understand in seven words. On your mark, get set, go.

BEN SMITH: Brain to gut, we’ve got incoming snacks.

[LAUGHTER]

[APPLAUSE]

MARC ABRAHAMS: To honor the next 24/7 Lecturer, we ask you, everyone in the audience who has one, to reach into your pocket, take your smartphone, and hold it aloft. OK, everyone here on the stage, you too. This 24/7 Lecture will be delivered by Trisha Pasricha, gastroenterologist at Beth Israel Deaconess Medical Center, an instructor of Medicine at Harvard Medical School, and coauthor of the medical study titled “Smartphone Use on the Toilet and the Risk of Hemorrhoids.”

[LAUGHTER]

[APPLAUSE]

The topic of this lecture is smartphones and the risk of hemorrhoids. First, a complete technical description of the subject in 24 seconds. On your mark, get set, go.

TRISHA PASRICHA: We conducted a cross-sectional study of adults undergoing screening colonoscopy and observed that the majority reported employing portable handheld computing devices during defecatory episodes. A multivariate logistic regression model demonstrated that defecation-associated computing device utilization was independently associated with a 46% increased odds of endoscopically verified hemorrhoidal disease.

[APPLAUSE]

MARC ABRAHAMS: And now a clear summary that anyone can understand in seven words. On your mark, get set, go.

TRISHA PASRICHA: Smartphones are a pain in the butt.

[LAUGHTER]

[APPLAUSE]

IRA FLATOW: We have to take a break. Here’s a taste of this year’s Ig Nobel mini opera entitled The Plight of the Gastroenterologist.

[PIANO PLAYING]

(SINGING) I ask how many bones survive

When they get swallowed, my best guess is 25

But it’s a mistake, maybe just the big bones do

They get digested to some degree

I’m going to test it

No guesswork, let’s really see

To solve the mystery, watch me swallow a shrew

[LAUGHTER]

IRA FLATOW: We’ll be right back with more from the Ig Nobel Awards in just a moment. Stay with us.

(SINGING) –a gopher could swallow a juicy rat

IRA FLATOW: I’m Ira Flatow, and you’re listening to Science Friday from WNYC Studios.

This is Science Friday. I’m Ira Flatow, and in case you’re just joining us, we’re playing highlights from this year’s Ig Nobel Awards ceremony. Here’s Ig Nobel Master of Ceremonies Marc Abrahams.

[APPLAUSE]

MARC ABRAHAMS: And now let’s get it over with, ladies and gentlemen, the awarding of the 2025 Ig Nobel Prizes. We’re giving out 10 prizes. The winners come from many nations. This year’s winners have truly earned their prizes. Karen, tell the winners what they’ve won.

KAREN: This year’s winners will each receive an Ig Nobel Prize.

[CHEERING]

This year’s Prize is a model of a human stomach. The two sides of the stomach each resemble a human face. One face is happy, and one face is grumpy.

MARC ABRAHAMS: Thank you, Karen. This year, 2025, long-distance travel suddenly became more challenging. Some of the prize-winning teams are not able to come to the ceremony. So instead, each of those teams sent an acceptance speech, and those acceptance speeches will be read aloud on their behalf during this ceremony by Nobel laureates. And now, here are the 2025 Ig Nobel Prize winners. The Literature Prize–

[PIANO PLAYING]

[APPLAUSE]

The winner is from the USA. The Ig Nobel literature Prize is awarded to the late Dr. William B Bean for persistently recording and analyzing the rate of growth of one of his fingernails over a period of 35 years.

[APPLAUSE]

Please welcome Dr. Bean’s son, Bennett Bean, who will accept the prize on behalf of his father.

BENNETT BEAN: Thank you all. As you can see, I have done nothing to receive this prize.

[LAUGHTER]

My father, however, did a great deal to receive this prize. For years, he measured the length of his fingernails. He also would use the family to check, so we all had our fingernails done. And he would file a little mark and then watch carefully as they grew.

I am one of two survivors of his patient pool because one of the wonderful things about doing a long term experiment on yourself is you never lose anybody to do it on. As long as you’re alive, you have a subject, and there are no legal complications either.

[LAUGHTER]

It’s simple. You’re there. Your fingernails are there, and you can continue endlessly to measure them. So I would like to thank you all very much for the honor. Now, in the case of the honor, it seems to me that the committee waited a little too long–

[LAUGHTER]

–because my father died before he could receive it. But then you’re never sure about what you’re going to be remembered for after you’re dead. Thank you all.

[APPLAUSE]

MARC ABRAHAMS: The Psychology Prize–

[PIANO PLAYING]

The winners are from Poland, Australia, and Canada. The Ig Nobel Psychology Prize is awarded to Marcin Zajenkowski and Gilles Gignac for investigating what happens when you tell a narcissist or anyone else that they are intelligent.

[LAUGHTER]

[APPLAUSE]

MARCIN ZAJENKOWSKI: OK, Gilles, so this is how the Ig Nobel audience looks like.

[LAUGHTER]

[APPLAUSE]

GILLES GIGNAC: It does look like a random sample but also a lot of randoms.

[CHEERING]

MARCIN ZAJENKOWSKI: Hold on. Hold on. I think that this site is very intelligent.

[LAUGHTER]

GILLES GIGNAC: This site, Marcin, not so intelligent, I’m assuming.

MARCIN ZAJENKOWSKI: OK, OK, let’s measure the narcissism. My smart site, on a scale from 1 to 5, how narcissistic do you feel right now?

[LAUGHTER]

I get the mean of 3.98.

GILLES GIGNAC: OK, now this not so smart side, what’s the narcissism level 1 to 5? Give me some numbers.

SPEAKER 3: 5!

GILLES GIGNAC: We got some numbers, OK. Marcin, it’s coming out to 3.71.

MARCIN ZAJENKOWSKI: OK, OK. Let’s do some stats. It’s p equals 0.04.

GILLES GIGNAC: And that is statistically significant.

[LAUGHTER]

MARCIN ZAJENKOWSKI: See? See? I told you that telling people they are smart increases their narcissism.

GILLES GIGNAC: In conclusion–

GILLES GIGNAC AND MARCIN ZAJENKOWSKI: –if you’re special and you know it, clap your hands.

[CLAPPING]

If you’re special and you know it, clap your hands.

[CLAPPING]

If you’re special and you know it and you really want to show it, if you’re special and you know it, clap your hands.

[CLAPPING]

[APPLAUSE]

MARC ABRAHAMS: The Nutrition Prize–

[PIANO PLAYING]

The winners are from Nigeria, Togo, Italy, and France. The Ig Nobel Nutrition Prize is awarded to Daniele Dendi, Gabriel Segniagbeto, Roger Meek, and Luca Luiselli for studying the extent to which a certain kind of lizard chooses to eat certain kinds of pizza.

[LAUGHTER]

[APPLAUSE]

The winners could not travel to the USA. Their acceptance speech will be read on their behalf by Nobel laureate Esther Duflo.

[APPLAUSE]

ESTHER DUFLO: This is the acceptance speech for the 2025 Ig Nobel Nutrition Prize. It was written by one of the co-winners, Luca Luiselli. I’m delivering the speech on his behalf as well as on behalf of the French person–

[LAUGHTER]

–which I can. “Dear organizers, dear all, thank you, thank you so much. I am deeply honored and slightly confused–

[LAUGHTER]

–to receive the Ig Nobel Prize. When we began studying urban agamas snacking on discarded pizza in seaside resorts in Togo, we never dreamed it would lead to international recognition.

[LAUGHTER]

Of course, as every good Italian, I knew that four-cheese pizza is irresistible.

[LAUGHTER]

But honestly, our lizards did really well, better than any Italian lizard. My colleagues, Professor Gabriel Segniagbeto and Dr. Roger Meek and Daniele Dendi, and I simply wanted to answer the age-old scientific question– what happens when a lizard discovers cheese and carbs?

[LAUGHTER]

Now we know, and the answer is they behave like Italians.

[LAUGHTER]

I want to thank my dedicated team of researchers who endured sunburns, pizza cravings, and one particularly aggressive seagull.

[LAUGHTER]

A special thanks to the agamas themselves for their bold dietary choices and unapologetic love of cheeses. This work proves that adaptation, like science, can be strange, surprising, and occasionally delicious. May we all continue to pursue questions that first make us love and then make us think. Thank you very much for the appreciation.”

[APPLAUSE]

MARC ABRAHAMS: The Pediatrics Prize–

[PIANO PLAYING]

The winners are from the USA. The Ig Nobel Pediatrics Prize is awarded to Julie Mannella and Gary Beauchamp for studying what a nursing baby experiences when the baby’s mother eats garlic.

[LAUGHTER]

[APPLAUSE]

JULIE MANNELLA: Thank you for celebrating our work that what mothers eat flavors the milk, and we later went on to show also amniotic fluid. At the time, mothers were advised to eat a bland diet for fear the baby would reject her milk. On the contrary, infants savored the flavor of garlic and other flavors in which she ate. In other words, don’t dismiss mothers, and don’t dismiss garlic. [LAUGHS] Gary?

[APPLAUSE]

GARY BEAUCHAMP: So when I started my research career, I got a call from NSF, where I had a grant, and told me he had some bad news for me. I had just been a finalist in something called the Golden Fleece Awards. Some of you may what those are. They’re there nothing you want to be because they’re for the stupidest, dumbest, biggest waste of money for the government for science.

And I said, well, why did I get it? And he said, well, your title and your grant was about Guinea pigs, sex, and smell, and that was sufficient. So luckily, I didn’t get the final award. Thank goodness. But this is sort of the culmination of that where I’ve given up on the sex and the Guinea pigs but stuck with the smell. And it is really smelly.

GARY DREYFUSS: Please stop. I’m bored. Please stop. I’m bored. Please stop. I’m bored. Please stop.

GARY BEAUCHAMP: Thank you.

[LAUGHTER]

[APPLAUSE]

MARC ABRAHAMS: The Biology Prize–

[PIANO PLAYING]

The winners are from Japan. The Ig Nobel Biology Prize is awarded to Tomoki Kojima, Kazato Oishi, Yasushi Matsubara, Yuki Uchiyama, Yoshihiko Fukushima, Naoto Aoki, Say Sato, Tatsuaki Masuda, Junichi Ueda, Hiroyuki Hirooka– sorry, Hiroyuki Hirooka, and Katsutoshi Kino for their experiments to learn whether cows painted with zebra-like striping can avoid being bitten by flies.

[LAUGHTER]

[APPLAUSE]

TOMOKI KOJIMA: Ladies and gentlemen, we are deeply honored to receive this award, and we are grateful to our colleagues, friends, and families. And we would like to extend our heartfelt gratitude to the organizers and the esteemed panel of judges. Stripes discourage biting flies from landing using cows painted zebra-like stripes like this. Thank you very much.

[APPLAUSE]

MARC ABRAHAMS: Thank you very much. The Chemistry Prize–

[PIANO PLAYING]

The Ig Nobel chemistry Prize is awarded to Rotem Naftalovich, Daniel Naftalovich, and Frank Greenway for experiments to test whether eating Teflon, a form of plastic more formally called polytetrafluoroethylene, is a good way to increase food volume and hence satiety without increasing calorie content.

[LAUGHTER]

[APPLAUSE]

The winners could not travel to the ceremony. Their acceptance speech would be read on their behalf by Nobel laureate Moungi Bawendi.

[APPLAUSE]

MOUNGI BAWENDI: This is the acceptance speech for the 2025 Ig Nobel Chemistry Prize. It was written by co-winner Rotem Naftalovich. I am delivering this speech on his behalf.

[APPLAUSE]

“Esteemed colleagues, confused relatives, and curious bystanders, thank you. I am deeply honored to receive the Ig Nobel Prize for research that makes people laugh, then makes them think, and occasionally makes them question my judgment.

[LAUGHTER]

Science is a journey paved with strange questions and sometimes stranger answers. May we never run out of either. Thank you.”

[APPLAUSE]

MARC ABRAHAMS: It’s time for more 24/7 Lectures. This 24/7 Lecture will be delivered by Deborah Anderson, Professor of Obstetrics, Gynecology, and Virology, Immunology, and Microbiology at Boston University’s Chobanian and Avedisian School of Medicine and co-winner of the 2008 Ig Nobel Chemistry Prize. She won that Prize for discovering that Coca-Cola is an effective spermicide under some conditions.

[LAUGHTER]

The topic– cola. First, a complete technical description of the subject in 24 seconds. On your mark, get set, go.

DEBORAH ANDERSON: When Coca-Cola was invented in 1888, it contained a potent mix of cocaine and caffeine and was marketed as a medicinal syrup for the treatment of morphine addiction in an array of neurologic and digestive disorders. The cocaine was removed in 1906, and carbonated water was added, transforming it into the iconic drink we know today. Over 1.8 billion drinks are sold each day on Earth.

[WHISTLE BLOWS]

MARC ABRAHAMS: And now a clear summary–

SPEAKER 4: [INAUDIBLE] seconds [INAUDIBLE].

MARC ABRAHAMS: –that anyone can understand in seven words. On your mark, get set, go.

DEBORAH ANDERSON: Coca-Cola– refreshing spritzer or mysterious elixir?

[LAUGHTER]

[APPLAUSE]

IRA FLATOW: The awards are presented by the editors of the science humor magazine Annals of Improbable Research. You can find out more about them at improbable.com. Coming up, more highlights from this year’s 35th first annual Ig Nobel awards. Stay with us. I’m Ira Flatow, and you’re listening to Science Friday from WNYC Studios.

This is Science Friday. I’m Ira Flatow, and we now return you to highlights from this year’s Ig Nobel awards ceremony, research that first makes you laugh and then makes you think, recorded in September of this year at Boston University. Here’s Ig Nobel Master of Ceremonies Mark Abrams.

MARC ABRAHAMS: The Peace Prize–

[PIANO PLAYING]

The winners are from the Netherlands, the UK, and Germany. The Ig Nobel Peace Prize is awarded to Fritz Renner, Inge Kersbergen, Matt Field, and Jessica Werthmann for showing that drinking alcohol sometimes improves a person’s ability to speak in a foreign language.

[LAUGHTER]

[APPLAUSE]

The winners could not travel to the USA. Their acceptance speech will be read on their behalf by Nobel laureates Svante Paabo and Robert Merton.

[LAUGHTER]

KAREN: [INAUDIBLE]

SVANTE PAABO: I read it?

KAREN: [INAUDIBLE]

SVANTE PAABO: This is the acceptance speech for the 2027 Ig Nobel Peace Prize. I’m delivering this speech on their behalf as you understand. “We made an important discovery. Drunken Germans usually pronounce Dutch better than sober Germans.

[LAUGHTER]

And it’s not just that the drinkers thought their Dutch was better. Independent raters judged their pronunciation as clearer. Like many great scientific ideas, the idea of this study actually came up at an international conference in the evening at a bar. It started with colleagues from different countries speaking different languages and sometimes joking, ‘I swear I speak better Dutch after a glass of wine.’ Rather than leaving it at that, we decided to test it properly.”

ROBERT MERTON: “What we found was fascinating– a low dose of alcohol, less than a pint of beer, did make people think they spoke Dutch better.

[LAUGHTER]

But independent raters actually judged their pronunciation to be clearer. In short, a small sip seemed to boost confidence without making the words fall apart. Now, before anyone rushes to claim language lessons as tax-deductible bar bills–

[LAUGHTER]

–let us stress, we do not recommend alcohol as a tool to learn a new language. At higher doses, it seriously impairs memory, attention, and behavior, the very skills that you need to learn a language and, frankly, to function in everyday life. So thank you again for this recognition. We take the science seriously, even if we started with a laugh over a drink. We want to thank our coauthors, Inge Kersbergen and Matt Field, as well as everyone who supported this research, most of all the students who were involved in the study–

[LAUGHTER]

–and data collection. Thank you.”

[APPLAUSE]

MARC ABRAHAMS: The Engineering Design Prize–

[PIANO PLAYING]

The winners are from India. The Ig Nobel Engineering Design Prize is awarded to Vikash Kumar and Sarthak Mittal for analyzing from an engineering design perspective how foul-smelling shoes affect the good experience of using a shoe rack.

[LAUGHTER]

The winners could not travel to the United States, and so we’ve arranged that their acceptance speech will be read on their behalf by Nobel laureates Eric Maskin and William Kaelin.

[APPLAUSE]

ERIC MASKIN: All right, yeah. So this is the acceptance speech for the 2025 Ig Nobel Engineering Design Prize. It was written by co-winner Vikash Kumar, and I am delivering this speech on behalf of Vikash Kumar. Namaste. “It took a few emails from Mark and even a video call to convince us that it was not a prank.

[LAUGHTER]

So thank you, Mark, the review members, and Susan Caney, who thoughtfully ordered lavender sachets for our shoe rack. We’ll collect them when we meet you. Beyond the fun and laughter tonight, let us briefly paint a picture to show the seriousness of the problem.

Imagine you’re on a plane or a bus, and your fellow passenger decides to get a little more comfortable by removing their shoes. If they’re smelly, a part of you experiences hell. No perfume can mask it. Sometimes it makes a worse cocktail.

This project began as a student assignment by my coauthor, Sarthak, who noticed shoes kept outside hostel rooms. At first we thought it was simply due to a lack of shoe racks, but soon we discovered the real reason– the smell. One student even joked, either the shoe stays in the room or we do.”

WILLIAM KAELIN: “The funniest part– testing the smell levels. Sensors failed us, so we recruited brave human noses. Special thanks to Karanvir and Sanjoy for lending them to science. By now I suspect that the bananas are growing restless, so let us conclude.

This journey taught us two things– design doesn’t always start glamorous. It often begins with noticing the ordinary and refusing to ignore it. And solving real problems takes more than disciplinary knowledge, from engineering to design to life sciences. Thank you for celebrating our work. We hope it made you laugh first and then think. Have a wonderful evening. Namaste.”

[APPLAUSE]

MARC ABRAHAMS: This next 24/7 Lecture will be delivered by Gus Rancatore, proprietor of Toscanini’s Ice Cream Shop.

[APPLAUSE]

The topic– ice cream. First, a complete technical description of the subject in 24 seconds. On your mark, get set, go.

GUS RANCATORE: Yum, yum, yum, yum, yum.

[LAUGHTER]

Yummy, yummy, yummy.

[LAUGHTER]

Yum. Yum. Yum, yum, yum.

[WHISTLE BLOWS]

[LAUGHTER]

[APPLAUSE]

MARC ABRAHAMS: And now a clear summary that anyone can understand in seven words. On your mark, get, set, go.

GUS RANCATORE: Yum.

[LAUGHTER]

Yum, yum, yum. Yum.

[APPLAUSE]

MARC ABRAHAMS: The Aviation Prize– the winners are from Colombia, Israel, Argentina, Germany, the UK, Italy, the USA, Portugal, and Spain. The Ig Nobel Aviation Prize is awarded to Francisco Sánchez, Mariana Melcón, Carmi Korine and Barry Pinshow for studying whether ingesting alcohol can impair bats’ ability to fly and also their ability to echolocate.

[LAUGHTER]

[APPLAUSE]

FRANCISCO SÁNCHEZ: OK, this is a big honor. Thank you very much. Our research was about making some parties for bats, and we had to provide them some ethanol. The problem is that the bats didn’t like it.

[LAUGHTER]

Thanks very much for those people who thought our research was enlightening and mildly ridiculous and of course to our families that have been supporting these nocturnal obsessions. Robert [? Dudley ?] inspired most of the research we did in that moment, and Burt [? Cutler ?] helped us with some foraging theory. And of course, [INAUDIBLE] helped me getting here, so that’s a bit important. And what’s that? Oh, Mr. Bat, are you OK? Well, yes, I think I am.

[LAUGHTER]

You look a bit strange. You are flying kind of funny, and you are speaking kind of gibberish. Really? Yeah, you look nervous too. But what happened to you? What were you doing? Well, I was eating just some interesting figs. Well, Mr. Bat, it’s good I found you because if we were found by some of those owls that are over there, you would be part of the predatory channel.

GARY DREYFUSS: Please stop! I’m bored!

FRANCISCO SÁNCHEZ: That man is scary.

GARY DREYFUSS: Please stop.

FRANCISCO SÁNCHEZ: Thank you. Bye-bye.

GARY DREYFUSS: I’m bored.

[APPLAUSE]

MARC ABRAHAMS: The Physics Prize–

[PIANO PLAYING]

The winners are from Italy, Spain, Germany, and Austria. The Ig Nobel Physics Prize is awarded to Giacomo Bartolucci, Daniel Maria Bucielo, Matteo Ciarchi, Alberto Corticelli, Ivan di Terlizzi, Fabrizio Olmeda, Davide Ravignas, and Vincenzo Maria Schimmenti for discoveries about the physics of pasta sauce–

[LAUGHTER]

–especially the phase transition that can lead to clumping, which can be a cause of unpleasantness.

[LAUGHTER]

[APPLAUSE]

GIACOMO BARTOLUCCI: We know you might think that this work confirms all the stereotypes about Italians, like that we only think about food.

[LAUGHTER]

But this is not true. In this work, we studied the phase behavior of protein mixtures, but first, let me say a few words. [SPEAKING ITALIAN]

A perfect cacio e pepe is characterized by a silky and creamy sauce that makes this dish delicious and iconic. However, achieving that perfect sauce is challenging. At high temperatures, cheese proteins aggregate, form clumps, and end up in a big, giant, unpleasant clump, the mozzarella phase.

SPEAKER 5: Mozzarella! [LAUGHS]

GIACOMO BARTOLUCCI: I think we discovered the only case in which Italian mozzarella is a bad thing. However, there’s a way to avoid it– adding starch to the sauce.

SPEAKER 5: No! No starch!

[LAUGHTER]

GIACOMO BARTOLUCCI: Studying protein aggregates is believed to be very important in several fields, origin of life, the formation of amyloid fibers in Alzheimer’s.

[SINGING IN ITALIAN]

GIACOMO BARTOLUCCI: Today, it’s also very important to create the perfect cacio e pepe.

[SINGING IN ITALIAN]

[APPLAUSE]

MARC ABRAHAMS: We ask all the winners, all the Nobel laureates, the 24/7 Lecturers, and the other ceremony participants to gather here now on stage for a pointless photo opportunity. Please line up here.

[LAUGHTER]

Feel free to applaud if you so choose.

[APPLAUSE]

[PIANO PLAYING]

Thank you. As you leave the lecture hall, please help us tidy up. There are a few paper airplanes here. If you see a stray paper airplane, please gather it, and maybe ask an Ig Nobel Prize winner to sign that paper airplane, transforming it into a historic item. Now, Barry Duncan will give the traditional Ig Nobel Goodbye, Goodbye speech.

BARY DUNCAN: Good, bye, goodbye.

[APPLAUSE]

MARC ABRAHAMS: Thank you for joining us at the 35th First Annual Ig Nobel Prize ceremony. We estimate that next year’s ceremony will be the 36th First Annual Ig Nobel Prize ceremony. Now, on behalf of Improbable Research and on behalf of the Boston University College of Communication, please remember this final thought. If you didn’t win an Ig Nobel Prize this year, and especially if you did–

[LAUGHTER]

–better luck next year. Thank you.

[APPLAUSE]

[MUSIC PLAYING]

IRA FLATOW: And that about wraps it up for us. Thanks to Marc Abrahams and everyone at The Annals of Improbable Research. You can find out more about them at improbable.com. We’re going to leave you with a sampling from this year’s Ig Nobel mini opera entitled The Plight of the Gastroenterologist. Here’s a little taste of the opera.

(SINGING) Well, my first grateful patient

Has brought a gift to me

A pizza with pepperoni

[APPLAUSE]

Well, my second grateful patient

Has brought a gift to me

Two chili dogs

And a pizza with pepperoni

IRA FLATOW: And of course, if you’ve missed any part of the program or you would like to hear it again, subscribe to our podcasts or point your device to our website at sciencefriday.com. You can join us on social media all week and check out all our great newsletters too. And you can email us the old-fashioned, classic way, scifri@sciencefriday.com. Have a great holiday weekend. I’m Ira Flatow.

(SINGING) And a pizza with pepperoni

[APPLAUSE]

[MUSIC PLAYING]

IRA FLATOW: This episode was produced by Charles Bergquist. I’m Ira Flatow. Thanks for listening.